William's Corner

Well. 2months plus had passed and some pretty deep shit situations happen. I'm clearly saying I'm not myself anymore. Somewhat changed into a fucked up William. My emoticons got the upper hand and took over me. Everything that I'm not satisfied or hate I'll be in a angry rage mode. Because of this situation. I've lost a friend. A bloody close one. Not to say she's dead or anything but yeah, I scolded her out of pure anger and hate like I'm another version of Ghost Rider. Asian and short. Ok back to story. I scolded her and we became enemies or something like that. Arch nemesis?

And by scolding my close friend. I've also lost my bibiboo. You might not know who she is. But to me she's a damn good, beautiful, funny, friendly, caring type of girl that have been accompanying me, walking beside me on this road in the Year of the Sadness Dragon for 2 months and 20 days. I feel happy walking with this girl, but I guess she had left me and I walk this broken road alone again :) she's just plainly awesome. I even loved her starting from September last year till now and i still love her. But now, it's just me walking this road alone. My life kinda suck now actually. Mum nag all day about studies, family problems every now and then. And just recent.

My best bud that I've known for 4 years is being promoted to go up another class. I'm ok with it but I'm gonna be lonely everytime starting tomorrow. No one disturbing me, talking bullshit with me and any other crap. Losing this guy that's been sitting with me for 1 year straight is really counted as losing a part of my school life. Being in class would suck everyday now. I want someone to be beside me doing the same stuff he did. Like this it will still be awesome. Now I've lost a huge connection of friends because of this new situation. I'm feeling lonely and also feeling knives stabbing me from the back. I don't wanna feel lonely this last year. Lonely to someone is nothing. But for me it's something scary. I have a fear of being lonely. Got this from a young age. And that's good for my friends cause I cant hold grudges for even a day. But hours yes. I just don't know what to do. Should I just stop walking or continue until I see the end? This year is my final journey in my schooling years. I'll try my best to cherish this final year of my schooling era.

My message to those 3 important people that I've mentioned above

Friend : sorry for what I've did today, wasn't thinking straight. I think this was my first time scolding someone without even knowing what's the main problem. But seriously I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you someday. I might even help you beat the shit out of your ex someday during this year? :) take care of your health and stay happy with your bf. He should be happy for having you. :)

Bibiboo : hey. I know you've been checking my blog everytime when you're free. :) what I want to say to you is. I know we had arguments and I can't love you right. I've made you cry too during some arguments. I'll be waiting for your decision. If you chose "that". I would want to say that i am not your Mr. Right. Someone out there is your Mr. Right but not silly me. I only make your life worse. You'll find a better one that is more handsome, understanding, lovable, funny and caring than me by ten folds. :) I'm just a normal 17 year old boy who knows nothing about love. But if you choose to stay together. I'll learn the ways to treat you right. Make you smile everyday. Laugh everyday and so. Any decision you do I'll just follow cause it's your decision and I can't stop you. Try and don't think negatively. Think positive and move forward :) 我会等着你的决定。

Best bud : hey fag! You wont be reading my blog but I just want to write it down just to let you know. For the 3 years being with you in the same class was plainly awesome. All the shit we two together. It's fun. Still remember the first time i met you. I though you were a dick. But now this dick is a cool dick if you know what I mean :p you might be an annoyance sometimes but overall you're cool. Hope after SPM I'll be sitting your car and we gonna go out like mad. :p all the best for your SPM yeah? :)

The Final Journey, My Final Destination starts now. William signing out

Well. After 2 months of a relationship. I'm single again :(

The decision that I've made. If you told me about that earlier. I shouldn't have made it. I guess right now your friends are all on an Anti-Me campaign or something like that. I'm sorry that I can't be your Mr. Right. Your Prince Charming. I'm just a guy that I think I suck in these type of stuff.

Dear. I know that message was sudden. I keep thinking that I was your problem that made you cry almost every night which is not. Besides, I too also gave problem to you to make you cry. I swear you'll find someone better, funnier, and give more caring and love to you more than I do.

I still love you and care about you, dear :)
Even if we break. I will still be your friend :)
And I'll try my very best to make our class to be as the same as last year :)